Dying To Self - Look at Isaiah 53:7
Anytime we “react” to someone else, we’re operating in the flesh. We need to step back, be led of the Holy Spirit, and “respond” appropriately. Jesus was falsely accused but He didn’t defend Himself. Isaiah 53:7.
Why do we defend ourselves when we feel attacked by other people? It might seem like the answer is a bit obvious—because someone’s attacking us! But why do we defend ourselves against the attack? What would happen when someone attacks us (not physically) or mischaracterizes us or something similar and we did not defend ourselves? Would it change anything about who we intrinsically are? Would it make their attacks true about us? Would it make us a worse person?
We all have three large basic needs at the core of our emotional (and, I would argue, spiritual) selves: The need to be loved, the need to be worthy, and the need to be good. Often when we defend ourselves, we are protecting one of these things from being damaged.
Here’s the good news, though: Jesus advocates for these things on our behalf before the Father, whose opinion ultimately matters more than any other (1 John 2:1). When someone, knowingly or not, attacks us or hurts us or mischaracterizes our intentions, we do not need to defend ourselves because Jesus is taking care of our defense. The incredible thing that this does for us is this: it frees us up to connect with the other person. When I no longer have to worry about defending myself, I can lean into what the other person is saying, get curious, take time to listen to the wisdom of the Holy Spirit in the moment, and build intimacy with the person in front of us. #dyingtoself